I just finished reading a Christmas letter, a Special Story, reminiscent of words spoken and written by Irma Bombeck before she died of cancer a few years ago. I was thinking that it was written for the 'old' folks, but it should be read by the 'young' folks as it will give them a bit of incite to what it is like to become a senior member of society. Everyone gets there sooner or later, but the young folks do not take the time to understand what is , or has, happened to their older family members and their friends. It is LIFE and one day they will have to apologize as they find out what aging is all about and they didn't understand . Maybe this letter will help avoid the same pitfalls we challenged so many years ago when we didn't want to hear or listen to the 'old folks'.
The letter reads: "I would never trade my amazing friends, my wonderful life, and my loving family for less gray hair or a flatter belly..As I've aged, I've tried to be kinder to myself and less critical of myself. I've become my own friend..I don't chide myself for eating that extra cookie, or for not making my bed, mowing the lawn or for buying silly things I don't need, but they look so great to me, so I am entitled to a treat, to be messy and be extravagant, if a trinket or a silly purchase draws my attention.
I have seen so many dear friends leave this world too soon; before they understood the great freedom that comes with aging.
It makes no difference to anyone else if I read, watch T.V. or play the computer until 4 A.M. and then sleep till noon. I will dance with myself to those wonderful tunes of the 50's 60's and 70's, and if I ,at the same time, wish to weep over lost loves of my family. I will walk the beach in a swimsuit that is stretched over a bulging body, and dance in the incoming waves, with abandon, if I choose to, despite the pitying glances of the jet set. 'They too will get old'. I know sometimes I am forgetful, but there again some events in my life are just as well forgotten. Eventually I will remember only the very important things.
Sure over the years my heart has been broken. How can a heart not break when you lose a child or loved one, or when a child suffers, or even a beloved pet gets hit by a car, or dies of some disease or cancer. But broken hearts give us strength and understanding and compassion. A heart never broken is pristine and sterile and will never know the joy of being imperfect.
I am blessed to have lived long enough to have my hair turning gray and to have my youthful laughs be forever etched into the deep grooves on my face. So many have never laughed, and so many have died before their hair turned silver. As you get older, it is easier to be positive. You care less about what people think, I don't question myself anymore, I've earned the right to be wrong.
So, to answer your question, I like being old. It has set me free. I like the person I have become. I am not going to live forever, but while I am still here, I will not waste my time lamenting what could have been, or worrying about what will be.
I shall eat dessert every day if I want. cook a full course dinner even if most of it is wasted, or I can give it away. I shall put my hair in a ponytail or put on a hairpiece and get on the floor to exercise even if it takes a little time and effort, to stand on my feet. I will keep trying. yes, I may slow down, but I will keep going and be proud when I accomplish what I am striving to do. My friends who are my age are all met by the same confrontations. There is no need to look back, as the future may hold some wonderful surprises and blessings. May our friendships never come apart, especially when it comes straight from the heart."
A nice letter, a letter to make us smile and to think about who we are and what we do accomplish as we age, and hopefully a message to the young ones to take the time to take care of themselves now as they start to age so that when they get to the high point of their lives they will be in good shape for the shape they are in and love every minute of it. I hope they reach a 'fine' old age and have a smile in their eyes, love in their hearts and remember the message from the old folks. Hugs to all.
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